Should a nanny post photos of their charges on social media?

This is a topic I often hear discussed, and one I think about a lot of the time.

In recent years the increase of use in facebook, Twitter, Instagram...... Has been a way to show our "friends" what we have been up to! I too am one of those people, I love photos generally, and love to show places I have been, or things I have done, but can I post pictures of my charges?

My opinion is no!! I have taken some super cute photos over the years, that I would love to share, but I dont, why? Because they are not my children!!! It is not for me to share to the world other people's children's faces and activities. Likewise on social media, I will never put their names.

When we start work as a nanny for a new family, we sign a contract that says we will keep all things to do with the family and their affairs confidential, and I believe this to includes children's names and photographs.

I don't at all think it is wrong to take photos of the children, in fact it is something I would encourage because I think it is a nice way to show their parents where we have been, and what they have done.

Photos can also make lovely gifts to their family members.

Keep on taking photos of your adventures, by all means share pictures of locations, but keep your charges images private!!

Going back!!!

So, tomorrow I travel back to work after 3 weeks off sick following a tonsillectomy - a week longer than I was originally told by the consultant, but a definitely much needed extra week!!

As I go back, I am sure I will be met with some disappointment as well as excitement, I am fairly sure I will get a Toria can you go back home now once our routine starts again.

Do I give in and let them get away with some things, or carry on as usual, whether I had been away or not?

Unfortunately for the charges, they will have the same old nanny back, if they refuse to eat then they won't eat, if they're cheeky they get disciplined, if they tell me to go away I will just turn and not say anything.

I believe very strongly, that we are not helping children by letting them get away with eveything. Boundaries are there for a reason, and we need to stay in those boundaries! We are not helping them by letting them get away with cheekiness or naughtiness, we couldn't say to our boss, oh we don't like this I am not doing it - so we have to teach them!!

Of course, I am sure it's not going to be that bad, I looking forward to getting back to some normality, and will be pleased to see the boys, and plan some Christmas activities!!

But for now, I think a coffee with my feet up is in order!

Surgery tomorrow

As I put the children to bed tonight, there was talk again about operations, and who is going to look after them, the same conversation we have had for a week!!

I assured them that all will be well, and promised I will be back in a couple of weeks......

That's when I thought, maybe I shouldn't have promised them anything, I know I will be absolutely fine, but what if...

Lesson learnt, don't promise anything you can't be 1000% sure off.

Is it the nannies job to clean?

This is often a tricky subject for employers and nannies!! It can end up being the being the end of a relationship!

I believe that it is not a nannies job to do the cleaning, obviously clean up the mess we make and tidy children's areas, but beyond that it is for the parents to arrange something to sort the general cleaning of the home.

I also believe it is not the nannies job to clean up from the family after a weekend or day off - a family expects us to leave the house tidy and I believe it's the same for when the nanny starts.

Firstly, it is a question to be asked or clarified at interview. If the job is to clean and look after the children then I think you need to think before taking the job on if this is a role you would like.

Keep on communicating, if you find you are doing more and more household job that ŵasnt in your contract then be honest with your employer and say this isn't what was agreed! Maybe they want to change the remit of your job, but this should be a discussion with both of you.

Don't start by doing too much extra jobs - it will come to be relied on and expected!!

Honesty is the best in this situation - and make sure it's in your contract whether it's part of your job!

its what a nanny does!!!

This is me today, soaking wet from the rain, the boys really wanted to go to the Zoo and so we duly did!! We had a great time looking at the animals and in the sea life centre - did I have to strip off as soon as we walked in? Yes! Did the children have a great time? YES!!

Do these things, it may seem and feel strange but it's memories for all of us to treasure for ever!!

over confidence in a child.....

We have all come across or worked or had friends with children whom we find difficult to tolerate because they are so full of themselves and their own importance.  Especially when they are young.

I have had experiences where I have spoken to by a child, where they have shown little respect - often by children where I have known the whole family, and the child/ren have heard the way parents or other adults speak to me and other adults and therefore think it is acceptable to speak that way - it is not!

I have also been around children, where when they are between the ages of 2-4years what they say and how the deliver it is amusing and cute, but in a few short years they will be looked on as precocious and rude, should we encourage this behaviour at their young age?

My own opinion is children need to know when, and how to communicate with their peers and elders, and if we inflate their confidence too much, they come across in a negative way, and sometimes have trouble forming and maintaining friendships.

I do believe we should teach and encourage children to be confident to converse and socialise with all ages, but we also need to educate them in a way that is appropriate for their ages and those around them.

I grew up in a Vicarage, and with that met a lot of different people, ranging from titled to the everyday people we all mix with, it was of course important that I was brought up to be respectful to all these people, BUT to also show respect to my family by how I behaved in social gatherings.

I believe that each of us, whether parent, nanny, friend, relative has a role to teach children what is acceptable social behaviour for them, and us as their carers! We want them to show respect for us, as their carers and to those we meet. We want the children to be successful and to have friends, we want people and our friends/family to like them and enjoy spending time with them, we want them to be loved and to have solid friendships.....

Give those children praise, give them encouragement, tell them how special they are, but in that giving of praise surround them with invisible barriers, so that they shine as they truly are, not as a child they are not!

What's a good day for a play date?

This wasn't an issue until recently in my current post, but since one is now at school, it is something i have to think about!!!

I think play dates are important, because I believe it forms stronger friendships for the children, is good socially for the children to be children outside of school, and I believe it is good for parents/nannies to form friendships too!

There seems to be a general consensus in the class, that Friday's are the best night for a play dates, for obvious reasons that it's the end of the week, and it doesn't matter if they go to bed later, as there is no school in the morning.

I have to be honest, I don't enjoy play dates on Friday, because selfishly (and I admit it is selfish) I want to finish work on time, whether it's just to sit in my pjs with a glass of something or to get off for the weekend - at 19.20 I want to know my week is completed, but with a Friday play date I know that this is going to push bedtime later, which then means I finish slightly later!!

It is one of those things that I guess I have to just get on with, and accept the reality of a play date - after all surely next year when they're that bit older we can do it on a Thursday?!